Your CC Routine
Posted: Mon Jan 15, 2018 1:07 amDo you have a routine when it comes to checking CC? A quick sitting in the morning before work and a long one when you get home from football practice? A cheeky session at the office from 12:30 to 1:30 while the boss is off having her vegan lunch? Brief spells 4-6 times a day in between lifting weights and pretending to be racist because it's your best chance at not getting gang-raped the next 14 months? Or do you just whip out your phone and engage in epic showdowns whenever you feel like it like you're some sort of pathologically megalomaniacal president?
I'm not gonna lie, on weekdays my periodic spiel is pretty solid. Weekends throw me off track completely, which is strange because I've been unemployed since before Walter White went head to head with a fly and emerged victorious. But yeah, I have a different sleep-pattern, eating-habit and gender over the weekend.
Anyway, onto my Monday-Friday CC drill. My alarm goes off at 5:30 giving me enough time to do my thing before kundalini-yoga at 8:00. After writing down my dreams, I give my Qur'an a little read to get me in the mood for Risk. Who doesn't feel like conquering the world after a couple of Surahs, am I right? Now that the divine faggot-hater is in my corner, I grab a box of Jaffa cakes (not McVitie's, the cheap ones from Lidl) and turn on my PC. I'm usually about halfway through the Jaffa cakes by the time it's booted, but I finish the box before I set off because I'm high in conscientiousness. Here we go.
I open iTunes - Beethoven, my man. Heaven blooms from my speakers, ripples through my body and caresses my soul. I open Chrome and Firefox, giving them half the screen each. My Chrome homepage is a Youtube video titled "What DMT is like - DMT Trip Simulation (1080p)". My Firefox homepage is Conquerclub. Inbox first. Normally Extreme Ways has messaged me enthusiastically about clan wars or whatever, or else some dude with more games played than points wants to team up. I'm no slut, if you're not Hokey 2 or riskllama chances are I'm not gonna warg into you. I get bored of Beethoven, so I put on some Machine Gun Kelly. I get bored of the DMT simulator, so I smoke 80mg of DMT (I save heroic doses for weekends).
My vision fills up with colours. Colours so colourful regular colours are grey in comparison. Colours I've never seen before. I can taste them. My senses amalgamate, dancing beautifully with each other. Every atom in my body is a Tsar bomb of euphoria. This is the best I've ever felt since the same time yesterday morning. I am completely overwhelmed by the experience, immobilised in ecstasy.
However, and this is where it gets good; in the split second between my ego evanescing like Manchester United's title dreams when Paul Scholes retired, and my consciousness leaving my body, I have a beam of lucidity. During this flash of clarity, I know exactly what my opponent is planning, how I can win and what I am going to roll. Fortunately for my Conquerclub career, this moment generally lasts anywhere from hours to months, giving me more than enough time to take all my turns and occasionally wander into the forum to make a post.
I'm not gonna lie, on weekdays my periodic spiel is pretty solid. Weekends throw me off track completely, which is strange because I've been unemployed since before Walter White went head to head with a fly and emerged victorious. But yeah, I have a different sleep-pattern, eating-habit and gender over the weekend.
Anyway, onto my Monday-Friday CC drill. My alarm goes off at 5:30 giving me enough time to do my thing before kundalini-yoga at 8:00. After writing down my dreams, I give my Qur'an a little read to get me in the mood for Risk. Who doesn't feel like conquering the world after a couple of Surahs, am I right? Now that the divine faggot-hater is in my corner, I grab a box of Jaffa cakes (not McVitie's, the cheap ones from Lidl) and turn on my PC. I'm usually about halfway through the Jaffa cakes by the time it's booted, but I finish the box before I set off because I'm high in conscientiousness. Here we go.
I open iTunes - Beethoven, my man. Heaven blooms from my speakers, ripples through my body and caresses my soul. I open Chrome and Firefox, giving them half the screen each. My Chrome homepage is a Youtube video titled "What DMT is like - DMT Trip Simulation (1080p)". My Firefox homepage is Conquerclub. Inbox first. Normally Extreme Ways has messaged me enthusiastically about clan wars or whatever, or else some dude with more games played than points wants to team up. I'm no slut, if you're not Hokey 2 or riskllama chances are I'm not gonna warg into you. I get bored of Beethoven, so I put on some Machine Gun Kelly. I get bored of the DMT simulator, so I smoke 80mg of DMT (I save heroic doses for weekends).
My vision fills up with colours. Colours so colourful regular colours are grey in comparison. Colours I've never seen before. I can taste them. My senses amalgamate, dancing beautifully with each other. Every atom in my body is a Tsar bomb of euphoria. This is the best I've ever felt since the same time yesterday morning. I am completely overwhelmed by the experience, immobilised in ecstasy.
However, and this is where it gets good; in the split second between my ego evanescing like Manchester United's title dreams when Paul Scholes retired, and my consciousness leaving my body, I have a beam of lucidity. During this flash of clarity, I know exactly what my opponent is planning, how I can win and what I am going to roll. Fortunately for my Conquerclub career, this moment generally lasts anywhere from hours to months, giving me more than enough time to take all my turns and occasionally wander into the forum to make a post.
